I wrote this post with my tail between my legs and a guilty “I ate the steak off the BBQ” dog face. Sorry I haven’t posted in so long. Life has been getting in the way of my little blog. I have very much been missing you guys though!

Logging into WordPress one of the first things I do is look at the stats tab. Once I’ve established my hit rate for the day is about average (nothing to see here) I move onto the ‘Search Engine Terms’ section. This is often quite amusing so I thought I’d share some of the ways in which people have found The Naked Envelope.

My blog name was decided on because I wanted something a little quiky, memorable and meaningful. However, including the word “naked” in my blog title has inadvertently been great for my SEO. It was a shock to me, but it turns out people are often Googling the word “naked”. A couple of you also yahoo’ed it, and binged it – binged? (to search via Bing) binged? (to overeat) Same… did they not think that through? So yes. Apparently utilising the word “naked” in my blog title is great for SEO.

How people have found me (and my comments):

• naked church women (sorry to disappoint)
• church women naked (still nothing)
• naked restaurant service (sounds…. unhygienic)
• naked weird stuff (no judgement)
• weird naked stuff (YEAH you do)
• tales of naked neighbours (saucy!)
• naked arabic artest film (hey, you know what you like!)
• breasted girls are perpendicular to naked (umm, not sure)
• my mum naked (this was quite a common one, Freud you wanna take this?)
• miranda naked (stop with the flattery you guyyyyzzz)
• weird shower caps (like attracts like)
• i can’t actually remember what i was doing… (neither can I friend… neither can I)
• my self date (all you need is time, baby)
• stupid llama (you tell it!)
• bushy beards (I WISH)
• hairy naked me (you go friend!)
• love kiwis (SAME)
• naked kiwis (as above)
• is there chicken in a can? (I’m glad you asked, here’s something I prepared earlier)
• naked mothers day (again, Freud?)
• celebrations of chrismus by naked families (I… I’m going to leave that one)
• suburban llama (maybe this is what you’re looking for?)
• how to quit fomo (if you find out, can you tell me?)
• the joy of being naked…. (oh the joy!)
• housemate naked (that was just ONE TIME)
• miranda wows naked (thank you)
• singles rant about weddings (right here)
• hairy naked males (send me the link when you find)
• solo date night on facebook (where ALL the good times are at)

In conclusion, I guess all I can say is I’m really sorry. Judging by the search terms, there are a lot of disappointed fun-seekers out there. I truly hope you find what you’re looking for!