• Sometimes it’s over before it’s even begun
• They both involve a lot of thought about what to wear
• You get sweaty with anticipation
• You want to be on time – something you care for little once you’ve scored
• Both are generally mildly to extremely unpleasant experiences
• They are high-risk situations, with potentially high rewards
• At least one person is out to impress
• The question “where do you see yourself in 5 years” could be asked in both. Evidently ‘not with you’ is an unsatisfactory reply to this question in either circumstance.
• You try to keep all the shitty things about you a secret, at least long enough until you’ve won them over with your charms
• You hold in your farts
• Mid-way through telling a story you forget why you’re telling it and struggle to get to the point. You want a clever way to end things but instead just fade out to silence
• Lies are told
• You don’t want to appear desperate, but you want them to know you’re keen
• If things go well you’ll usually go over the allocated time without realising
• You don’t really want to explain why you left the last lover/job, but you have to be prepared for the question
• You feign interest to what they’re saying even when you’re bored out of your mind, because you haven’t decided if you’re keen or not

• Just because you think it went well doesn’t mean it went well
• They’ll call you

It will end one of three ways:

• You are rejected and the pain makes you question all that is right in the world…Or
• You reject them gently with some lie about how you’re not ready, but in reality you just want to wait for something better to come along…
• You live happily ever after and never have to go on another first date/job interview again – yay for you!

Good luck, you guys!