about miranda ryan

Who knew the about me section of my own blog could be so painful to read and update.

I’m an Aussie who moved to Canada in 2019 where I met and fell hard for my love, Michael. We married last April and then in July he died. I found myself widowed at 35, in a foreign country in the middle of a global pandemic. It’s been… difficult.

This section of this site (formerly known as The Naked Envelope) used to say: This a place to keep all my stories, even if they aren’t particularly addressed to anyone (yet). These stories are the raw/naked me with no holding back… even when maybe I should.

Now? I’m split into two lives: Before and After.

Before Michael died I was working in the film industry in Canada, wanting to become a screenwriter. I had hopes and dreams and love and peace.

After Michael died I am a shredded heap, existing in a nightmare, without my love, in pieces. I found myself alone, grieving, traumatized and completely ill-equipped to deal with the loss of this magnitude. And the people around me weren’t equipped either – none of us are.  

If you’ve found this site because you’re grieving too, I’m so sorry for your loss.

If you’ve found this site because you want to help your person who is grieving, thank you. They need you now more than ever, even if they aren’t returning your calls or texts.

If you’re one of my people – thank you for reading and sticking with me. I wouldn’t be here without you.

I originally started this blog in 2011 as a place to keep my ramblings. I gave it up a few years later and thought I wouldn’t need it again. Now I’m in desperate need of an outlet for my grief. I also know I’ve been searching for stories of people like me. Clutching at the few I find that I can relate to, shying away from many others. Grief is not normalized, and it should be. It’s inevitable for everyone.

So I feel compelled to share my grief with the hope it will help someone who feels similar, or educate those lucky people who haven’t had to experience it on the front lines.

I’ll be figuring this shit out as I go, but my basic aim will be to add another voice to #normalizegrief and reduce various stigma.

Me in May 2021, wearing a shirt with my name on it because sometimes in grief you forget.

48 thoughts on “about miranda ryan

  1. Haha I’m following this blog now. I knew I liked your writing from reading several posts already but that last line was hilarious. I think I got here from Freshly Pressed… yes that must be it! I remember a time when search terms got me into trouble. I got a bunch of haters on a poem I wrote titled “Graffiti” which was about a desk that was marked up with decades of carvings and names but the little wannabe thugs on YouTube were confused, I don’t think they had ever heard a poem before… hmm maybe. Anyway, good luck on the blog, that is a catchy title I must say!

  2. The fact that you’re from Sydney just made you go up a notch. Australia was on my “Bucket List”…Sydney and Ayers Rock to be specific. I’d always wanted to see the opera house. I was so excited, but when I got there it was overcast, gloomy. cold, and raining. But I didn’t care. I LOVED IT.
    Anyhow, congrats on being Freshly Pressed…Awesome photo of you singing 😉

  3. Hi Miranda! I found your blog via the Freshly-pressed tab (along with a ton of other people, it seems), and I really enjoyed that Friday night movie post. Anyway, keep up the writing, and I’ll keep reading!

  4. You seem to be amusing, entertaining and interesting. I’ll try to follow your blog from time to time. Keep up the good work.

    Heads up on a typo: “The Naked Envelope is a place to keep all my storises, even if..”; storises = stories.

  5. BTW…I love your city. It’s where my husband and I went for our honeymoon. Favorite memories: La Boheme at the Sydney Opera House, lunch at Doyle’s on the most amazing spring day (with more sailboats on the harbor than we could count), a road trip to the wine country, then on to Surfer’s Paradise, then on to Brisbane (where we met some crazy Aussie’s at our hotel bar who I taught to two-step [we’re from Texas] and who got us totally bombed on sambuca shots). It was an awesome trip in a fabulous country with really stellar people. Would love to go back. You’re lucky…you get to live there!

  6. hahahhahahah is that you singing?? hahahaah You’re as funny as your texts, apparently 🙂 I’ll follow this blog as well, you have a captivating style 🙂

    PS – I didn’t come here searching for nakedness 😛

  7. Thank you so much for the laugh today! I came across your blog by accident and it made my day. I laughed out loud about the going to movies alone, and not having to share the popcorn. Thanks, I will follow along for more smiles and laughs.

  8. Yay Australian! Haven’t read an Australian’s blog in a while 🙂 I love karaoke too, not saying that I’m good at it haha…
    Glad I followed the link on freshly pressed 🙂

  9. Pingback: Always Wondered… | caratuckerblog

  10. Morning! You have been nominated for the Kreativ Blogger Award! Check out my blog for rules if you wish to accept! Happy Blogging!

  11. Hi! I just nominated you for the Very Inspiring Blogger Award! I’ve included a link to your site on my blog. You can accept and view the details at chanceofsun.wordpress.com.

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